How To Feel Better When You’re Alone

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The feeling of being alone is one that we have all experienced. Sometimes we choose to be alone, and other times it comes as a result of things we can’t control. This past weekend was the first time in a while where I experienced this feeling. It caught me by surprise to be quite honest. Living a busy lifestyle makes it easy for one to be surrounded by people and human interaction, and at the current moment, I think my life would fit into this category. Sometimes it’s tiring, but it’s also distracting. But what happens when the rush slows down?

The rush slowed for me as I arrived home from work last Friday. My roommates were both traveling, most of my friends were out of town, and I had no weekend work to get done. It was just me and the house cat. Having a weekend all to yourself can be refreshing, and a time to help you reset, think and catch up on projects, but it also can be hard to deal with if you aren’t used to it. When I’m alone, I tend to think about things that have happened in the past that I wish I could fix, or maybe have done differently. You can grow and learn by having your mind go there, but sometimes it’s too much to handle when you’re by yourself. It’s important to keep the head in a good space whenever you’re feeling alone, and there’s a few things you can do to help keep it there, and to help you instantly feel better.

bed

If you think, think positive.

Positive thoughts lead to positive outcomes. Being alone and without anyone to talk to makes it easy for thoughts to run wild in our head. Rather than dwelling on mistakes or things that take your mind to a negative place, think about things that get you excited, or times when you’ve felt the happiest. Keeping a journal filled with feel-good quotes is an easy way to get thinking upwards. Whenever you come across one you like, write it down. The next time you’re alone and need some words of encouragement, read back through your journal.

house

Explore.

Getting out of the house is the best thing to do when you’re feeling alone. Even if it’s just a quick walk around the block. Feeling the warmth of sunshine on my skin and being in the outside air makes me appreciate the day, and encourages me to explore new places. If you live in a city, try walking around a neighborhood you haven’t spent much time in, or drive to the next town over and find out what it has to offer. You might even make a new friend in the process.

flowers

cat

If you have a pet, play with it. 

I’ve grown up with dogs, so at heart I’m really not that much of a cat person, but sometimes that changes if you are forced to live with one. Like I said before, it was just me and my roommate’s cat this past weekend at the house. When you’re alone, you realize how much companionship an animal can bring.  They might not be able to talk, but they sure are good listeners :).

plan a trip

Plan a trip.

Being alone isn’t very exciting, so do something to get you excited about times ahead, like planning a trip. Use the down time you have to think about where you want to go, who you want to bring along, and all of the things you can do when you’re there. It it’s a road trip, try embroidering out your route for something creative and useful to do. If you have that dream location you’ve always wanted to travel to, figure out exactly how you are going to get there.

plants

reading

Go to a coffee shop.

Even though you might not be surrounded by people you know and love, you can still surround yourself with people. I’ve found that being in a room full of strangers is sometimes better than being in a room with just yourself when you are feeling lonely. Coffee shops are perfect for this. Spend a few hours at your favorite one, reading, drawing, surfing the web or just relaxing. Chances are, there’s someone sitting right next to you doing the same thing for the exact same reason.

window

Turn on the Netflix.

If nothing else, there’s always Netflix. Curl up on the couch with your favorite snack and start that series you’ve heard so much about, or that movie you’ve been wanting to see. Getting sucked into a plot line is an easy way to forget your feelings of being alone, and in my book there’s nothing wrong with watching an entire HBO series in one sitting.

cat and smoke

What do you do to feel better when you’re alone?

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Comments

Anonymous -August 26, 2014, 9:08AM

When I’m alone I read and write funny short stories…
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Irene -August 26, 2014, 9:25AM

I like to listen to music and draw when I’m alone. It’s very relaxing. And netflix is always a great idea haha. xoxo

jules -August 26, 2014, 11:31AM

i do some yoga :)
i love your tips and i will keep them in mind !

ataylor -August 26, 2014, 12:34PM

All of these are perfect tricks. I’ve happened upon many of these in moments of loneliness. Its amazing how just a small project or 15 minutes twitching a toy for my cat can completely change my mindset and bring peace to my loneliness.

Susan -August 26, 2014, 12:56PM

I really enjoy my “alone time” as well as my “couple time”… on my alone time I love taking “artist dates” – going to places that stimulate my creativity and inspire me – exploring antique shops with primitive rustic furniture is my current obsession. I also love walking through nurseries – i love being outdoors around all those beautiful plants……

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Alexandra -August 26, 2014, 1:18PM

When left alone with my thoughts I definitely tend to move towards negative daydreams and worries- so setting the intention to be mindful and positive is important to me. I also am so grateful for my puppy baby when I’m home alone!

Warm Regards,
Alexandra
http://www.littlewildheart.com

Tatiana -August 26, 2014, 2:22PM

I like the idea about planning out your next travel destination!
When I feel alone I mostly just listen to music, do yoga, and fiddle around on the internet. This post is actually getting me excited for the next time I feel alone. I am motivated to do some artsy shit-like exploring my town (which is actually perfect because I’ll see the reconstruction of many buildings).

http://tatianacunningham.blogspot.com/

Kathy -August 26, 2014, 3:34PM

Read a book!

Katy -August 26, 2014, 4:02PM

help, i feel alone without all of you :(

Rajiv M -August 27, 2014, 12:41AM

I play my keyboard or I’ll sit and draw something or I read blogs or I do write in my blog… :-)

Lovey -August 27, 2014, 1:11AM

Blog… Write music… practice every instrument I can find… Tumblr… and drink lots of tea!
xoxoxoxo

http://loveyenrose.blogspot.com

Madeleine -August 27, 2014, 1:13PM

I always make sure to have music on! It seems to help me steer clear of the negative thoughts and keep me at peace :)

Summer -August 27, 2014, 5:17PM

Jana.. we have the same feelz. I still struggle with this kind of stuff. I’m so used to being a do-er and rushing from A to B to C to F and then Z! Once I am able to stop and pause I just don’t know what to do with myself. Reading helps or exploring or I try to restyle areas of my home with already existing stuff. Yesterday I was home alone and just decided to completely redo my fiancé’s nightstand. He has this giant wolf head statue and I was tired of it being on my side of the room. It took about an hour and a half but I feel like HGTV specialist in training now and it gave his side of the room a more masculine vibe. you’re place already seems decked out with adorable-ness but small home projects or hand made anythings bring me incredible joy.

Thanks for the words of wisdom

xoxo

Summer

http://indianpaintblush.blogspot.com/

Megan // Oh Hey Blog -August 27, 2014, 9:20PM

I’m about to move to Paris for 3 months, by myself, without knowing a single soul. It’s going to be difficult but everyone needs to learn how to be alone sometimes. But when in doubt….I run to my boyfriend, Netflix :)

Monica -August 27, 2014, 11:08PM

Jana, love this and da pics… curious..are you wearing da FP leopard harem pants up top? XX

Anonymous -August 28, 2014, 3:19PM

I recently graduated from college and all my friends left me! I haven’t been feeling too lonely, but I’ll get random spurts of sadness that make me worry about myself and my health… I look up to you, Bridgette, Julie and Julia, so hearing that you, too, feel lonely sometimes helps me realize that it’s perfectly normal! Thank you for this! <3

Shelley -August 28, 2014, 5:14PM

I love this post. I’m going to bookmark it. Being an introvert and a creative, I need my alone time, but I find if I’m alone too much, I start to get kind of weird! I love all your suggestions, I would also say call someone! Even if you don’t have your friends close to you, call one far away. Human contact is essential.
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Gwen -September 25, 2014, 2:07AM

I love to take a long bath when I have time alone. Put on some mellow tunes (Trevor Hall is a good suggestion), light lots of candles, use a face mask, bubbles and/or mineral salt. I also like to make ice tea to drink while I’m in the tub because I start with the water really HOT and it is so nice to have something cool to sip on! I think the most important thing to enjoying alone time is to see it as a positive. Use it as an opportunity to rejuvenate, restore, and get in touch with yourself.

ウェブサイト -September 30, 2014, 6:05AM

It’s difficult to find educated people on this subject, however, you sound like you know what you’re talking about!

Thanks

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