This post comes from our contributor, FP Madisyn!
“If not now, when?”
I used to repeat this quite often while sitting in my hairdresser’s chair. I would look at the lengths of my split-end hair, which easily touched the bottom of my rib-cage, and sigh with the anxiety of change.
My hair tends to have a mind of its own. Black as coal, strong as a Brillo pad, and in humidity, frizzier than ever. It’s naturally curly, and my friends used to refer to it as “messy, but good messy.” I embraced that for quite a while, but still desired change. I wanted a challenge. I wanted to do something for myself to defy the way I held my presence. A test to force me to explore the way I dressed, danced, walked and talked. A challenge to, well, challenge my confidence.
Some may refer to this as a crisis, but I see it as life. This week last year, I sat down in my hairdresser’s chair. I was on her schedule for a simple bang trim. Just enough so I could finally see, after letting them grown in a tad too much. “If not now, when?” ran through my mind and “just cut it all off” slipped through my lips, echoing through the room. Brittany, my hairdresser, has a daring spirit and never hesitates. I showed her a quick picture of what I had in mind and a minute later I was holding my 24 inch ponytail in my hand. I felt a release. One that I’ve not felt in a long, long time.
My short hair was thrilling, sassy and refreshing. In the beginning, I loved every minute of it. The two minute shampoos, the sweet compliments. Volume was key to my pixie cut, because my hair was still curly and longer on top, while the back was shaved pretty short. I used lots of product and a curling iron to achieve a retro front and slicked-back sides. The way I dressed changed after the snip as well. I went from a Meadow/Lou-feel to full on Lou: skinnies, Converse and easy tees became my best friend. I quickly learned that a pixie cut is no joke. It needs to be shaped, trimmed, and styled. So the growing out process began, and let me tell you, its not an easy one. Keeping my hair healthy, and being optimistic helped me through this process.
So here I am today. I have a shaggy little bob, and I’m thinking about keeping it this way for quite some time. Not too short, not too long. A lot of people ask me if I regretted chopping all of my long hair off. I won’t lie and tell you it was a walk in the park, but it was good for me. It made me feel comfortable in my own skin and I learned not to shelter myself behind my hair. It also helped me let go of the haunting “what if” that many people never take. If you ever have that “if not now, when?” mindset, I say go for it. Embrace it, and let it teach you things.
Have any of you chopped all of your hair off, or are thinking about it? What were your “growing in” tips? Let me know in the comments below!
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