How Myers-Briggs Impacts Relationships, Career, Wellness Practices, Style and More

It’s the reason people think Jenna Birch just “gets” their problems soooo well, even though it’s something that anyone can learn more about and access. 

A few years ago, I fell in love with a theory that has served me well in understanding my relationships, friendships, career choices, communication style, bad habits, energy traps and so much more.

Allow me to let you in on my secret sauce: the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). Basically, according to the theory, everyone has an affinity for one of two traits in each of the four dichotomies. You’re either introverted (recharge solo) or extroverted (recharge with others), intuitive (abstract, theoretical) or sensing (grounded, practical). You’re either a thinker (make decisions rationally) or a feeler (make decisions compassionately). You’re a judger (planned, structured) or a perceiver (free-flowing, spontaneous). 

For example, I am an INTJ. This means I prefer enjoy to unwind on my own, tend to theorize and honor my gut feelings, prefer to make decisions using logic over emotion, and maintain plans to keep my life afloat. And there are countless ways my INTJ-ness intersects my real life. It affects the way I choose relationships and develop friendships, how I express myself, my struggle points and even my style. But enough about me.

If you’ve never discovered your four-letter type, there are countless free tests you can take online to confirm — or you can take the official Myers-Briggs test here to get a super-detailed report. So, go find your type! And then get back over here for a quick primer on you, your relationships, your wellness habits and more. (Warning: I’m about to change your life, friend.) 


INFP: The Dreamer

Who you are:

The introspective knowledge-seeker who everyone loves, but few people really know. You have deep feelings for those you love, and deeper beliefs about the world, religion and activism. You’re creative, empathetic and a born explorer. Easily bored with others, but never bored alone.

Quick hits:

Style: Quirky, individualistic; nostalgic throwbacks to other eras

Relationship strength: You’re a great listener

Relationship weakness: You let problems fester

Wellness strategy: Calling timeout for meditation, stress management

2020 Resolution: Put more dreams into action.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Yuzu Soap Dual Bath Salt Set 

ISTJ: The Pragmatist

Who you are:

The responsible, hard-working one who’s always keeping it real and keeping everyone in check. You’re punctual, reliable and always have a plan. Not exactly sexy traits, you think? Pssh, nonsense. That’s just your humility talking. 

Quick hits:

Style: Classic; well-constructed staples with a hint of personality (color, print)

Relationship strength: You’re consistent

Relationship weakness: You’re stubborn

Wellness strategy: Early-morning workouts and cooking after work

2020 Resolution: Take more risks.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: R+Co. Death Valley Dry Shampoo 

ESTJ: The Leader

Who you are: 

You’re the pragmatic leader. Want someone who can get the job done, as fast as possible, while making it look easy? Call on you. Type-A, forever-competent and sociable in your time off? You, in spades. You’re brilliantly capable as both a manager and a friend, which is why you excel in everything except your personal goals.

Quick hits:

Style: Work-to-weekend attire; functionality with a flare

Relationship strength: You’re committed to growth

Relationship weakness: You can brush off problems

Wellness strategy: Routines for gym time, meal prep, therapy, etc.

2020 Resolution: Make more time for yourself and your relationships.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: 7-Day Vegan Challenge

INFJ: The Empathizer

Who you are:

The wise one with a big heart, who only a few get to see. You understand everyone, but rarely feel understood. You’re smart and analytical, but you’re also welcoming and kind. You put others before yourself, but struggle to trust that others will do the same.

Quick hits: 

Style: Classics you can wear for years, neutrals, feminine touches 

Relationship strength: You always understand your partner’s POV

Relationship weakness: You bury your own feelings

Wellness strategy: Planning

2020 Resolution: Believe others will help meet your needs.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Sunday Riley Good Genes All-In-One Lactic Acid Treatment 

ENFP: The Humanist

Who you are: 

You’re a cheerleader, empathizer, champion for causes you believe in, and everyone’s BFF and/or moral high ground. You can’t resist a party and seek a lot of external stimulation — for better or worse. You love ideas and are full of vision; you just need to learn to execute one or two of ‘em. Here’s to the next decade, right? 

Quick hits: 

Style: Mismatched and unique, with tons of color and pattern

Relationship strength: You’re a team player

Relationship weakness: You can overextend yourself and build up resentment

Wellness strategy: Variety; you won’t stick to working out or healthy eating if it’s the same ol’ thing over and over. You like to be active, not exercise.

2020 Resolution: Make one goal and one plan, check it off, then make another. Repeat.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: RMS Beauty Lipshine 

ISFJ: The Caretaker

Who you are: 

You’re loyal, compassionate, responsible, thoughtful and kind. You’re a caretaker. You go the extra mile to put that special touch on homemade cookies or the massive work project everyone has been stressing about. People underestimate you, but they shouldn’t. If you say you’ll do it, it gets done.

Quick hits: 

Style: Classic, streamlined, elegant, understated

Relationship strength: You’re a caretaker

Relationship weakness: You’re too accommodating 

Wellness strategy: Discipline; you’ll hit every pilates class and cut sugar until you’ve reached your goals

2020 Resolution: Apply for the grant, or take a leap into a new field; you’re more capable than you think.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Lanolips Tinted Balm 

ESTP: The Mover ‘n Shaker

Who you are: 

Adaptable, calm and quick-witted with an adventuring streak, you live in the moment and teach others to let loose a little. You’re analytical and grounded, give great practical advice and never sweat the small stuff. Your low-key cool always earns you hoards of friends and followers. Just don’t forget to follow through on those promises you make, ‘kay? You tend to overextend yourself.

Quick hits: 

Style: On-trend, bold, exciting, playful, athleisure

Relationship strength: Adaptability

Relationship weakness: Inconsistency

Wellness strategy: You’re always moving, whether it’s on a jog with friends or to the latest workout class

2020 Resolution: Commit big to a relationship, a job, or your personal happiness.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Golde Turmeric Tonic 

ISTP: The Adventurer

Who you are: 

You’re the adventurer who will have a great time with friends, or alone. You do what you want, without apology, whether that’s taking a spontaneous trip to the mountains or switching jobs. You loathe boredom, and never like to stagnate. You’re cooler than school, because you don’t care too much about what naysayers think. It just wouldn’t be authentic. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Functional, athleisure, solids, zero frills

Relationship strength: You’re exciting

Relationship weakness: You’re forgetful

Wellness strategy: Heavy emphasis on movement, with a balanced diet; the outdoors are your sanctuary

2020 Resolution: Invest in your personal life.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Welly Bamboo Water Bottle 

ENTJ: The Visionary

Who you are: 

You’re the visionary leader — entrepreneur, inventor, investor, scientist. You always have a plan to push change, and you’re good at following your sterling intuition. You sometimes struggle with work/life balance… but then, what successful person doesn’t?

Quick hits: 

Style: Tailored minimalism with a little pizazz 

Relationship strength: You’re devoted

Relationship weakness: You’re critical

Wellness strategy: Squeezing it in, whether it’s a 20-minute walk, go-to healthy lunch spot or 5-minute meditation exercise

2020 Resolution: Be less critical and more thankful.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Shea Brand Shea CBD Pain Reliever 

ESFJ: The Giver

Who you are: 

You’re the social butterfly with a heart of gold. You are happy when everyone else is happy, which makes you one of the more selfless members of any crew. You love to make plans, give gifts, lead teams and generally excel in a very balanced way. You’re biggest Achilles heel: You have a tendency to commit to a lot at the expense of personal or wellness goals. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Cheerful, colorful, feminine, eye-catching

Relationship strength: You’re a giver

Relationship weakness: You don’t state your needs

Wellness strategy: You’re most consistent when you’re structured; plan those workouts and days off!

2020 Resolution: Ask for what you (really) want.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Lovewild Design Blooming Tea 

INTJ: The Chess Master

Who you are: 

You’re a mastermind. You’re always working toward your 20-year life goals, which means you thrive on consistency, structure and mindfulness. You’re an overanalyzer, which takes you far in career but can trip you up when it comes to interpersonal stuff. You’re brilliant and caring, but you save your energy for your very tight inner circle; it’s too hard for you to open up to a big crowd.

Quick hits: 

Style: Functional, but stylish and always on trend

Relationship strength: You’re a problem-solver, which can help lead to smart solutions

Relationship weakness: You’re an overthinker, which can create problems that don’t exit

Wellness strategy: You need to keep it consistent, but interesting; work out at the same time every other day, yes, but never do the same workout more than once in a week

2020 Resolution: Leap before you look, just once.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Supergoop! Invincible Setting Powder SPF 45 

ESFP: The Life of the Party

Who you are: 

Daring, fun and always ahead of the trend, you tend to lighten a party upon entrance — or any room for that matter. You know how to entertain a crowd. People see you as carefree and kind, but sometimes aloof. Despite the image, you take yourself and your goals seriously, and you’re great at whatever you try — if, of course, you can focus on one of your these interests long enough to see results. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Adventurous, trendy and of the moment, but with a nod to the classics

Relationship strength: You’re adaptable

Relationship weakness: You give up easier than you should

Wellness strategy: You tend to take action quickly when the mood strikes; you like to focus on self-care, a strong body and mind

2020 Resolution: Pursue a passion project with a long-term deadline.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Baiser Beauty Glow Stick 

ISFP: The Activist

Who you are: 

You’re thoughtful, interesting, opinionated and activism-focused. You always have a method to your madness, although you might seem impulsive to others. You are hard-working, and don’t like to sit still. You are authentic and true to your well-defined values, but can sometimes struggle to connect with others and tend to withdraw instead of face conflict with loved ones. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Stylish, individualistic, edgy, playful

Relationship strength: You’re accepting of quirks

Relationship weakness: You act aloof instead of reveal hurt

Wellness strategy: Built into your lifestyle and values; you’re vegan for both health and environmental reasons, and you’ll bike everywhere to preserve your body and the earth at the same time

2020 Resolution: State your feelings boldly.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: PYT Beauty Heartbeat Cheek Color 

ENFJ: The Magnet

Who you are: 

You’re an expressive, engaged, kind soul who always has more friends than any one person would need. People are drawn to you. Since you’re also driven, passionate and care deeply about creating a career that matters, you are a natural leader, coach and cheerleader. You usually have an affinity for the arts (acting, singing, drawing, etc), but can excel in business settings, too.

Quick hits: 

Style: Classic, no-fuss, elegant

Relationship strength: You’re thoughtful

Relationship weakness: You need a lot of attention

Wellness strategy: You value discipline and consistency, sticking to old classic workouts, therapy methods and meals that serve your body, mind and schedule

2020 Resolution: Balance private time with social time. 

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: Mineral Shimmer 

ENTP: The Innovator 

Who you are: 

You’re smart, witty and a natural problem-solver. You’re great with people, even if you feel like you struggle to find enduring connections. You’re highly capable of being great at whatever you try, whether that’s parenthood, a new career path or a relationship. You have amazing self-esteem once you’re already on a path, but you struggle to feel confident in your choices. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Easy, boho, carefree, unstructured

Relationship strength: You’re fun

Relationship weakness: You check in and out

Wellness strategy: You focus on pleasure, doing the workout you love and finding a therapist who speaks to you instead of wasting time on a meditation practice you think is “meh”

2020 Resolution: Look internally, not externally, for validation.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: 1809 Collection Camp Fragrance 

INTP: The Natural

Who you are: 

You’re a thinker, a philosopher and a knowledge-fiend. You’re the one at the party who knows all the silly trivia facts in addition to a deep well of knowledge in your field of choice. You love to theorize and hypothesize, and will play all sorts of mental games with anyone who will indulge you. People love having you around, but you are caught in books more often than real-life conversations. 

Quick hits: 

Style: Individualistic, pragmatic, functional

Relationship strength: You’re fascinating

Relationship weakness: You like your solitude

Wellness strategy: Keeping odd hours that only make sense to you; you sometimes work out at midnight and meal prep before work at 5am. As long as it gets done, right? 

2020 Resolution: Find consistency outside of work.

Product most likely to play you in a movie about your life: R+Co. Television Perfect Hair Masque 


Jenna Birch is a freelance journalist, author of The Love Gap: A Radical Plan to Win in Life & Love, and lifestyle expert. Her weekly relationship advice column, PureWow’s ‘Between the Sheets,’ runs every Tuesday. Her work appears in CosmopolitanHarper’s Bazaar, ELLE, Bustle, Well + Good, Man Repeller, The Washington Post, and more. She is a huge personality-typing nerd, yogi and advocate for chronic pain awareness. She lives for researching and reporting on relationships, mental health, wellness, psychology and happiness, mapping how these subjects intertwine with each person’s unique story.  


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I’m an INTJ too! This was such an interesting read! ❤️✨

Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog

Legally Bronde
4 years ago

This was a super cool post ! Very interesting !

3 years ago

Thanks for this great post! I think I am a dreamer and empathizer. I admire the natural beauty and healthy ways to live naturally, I like to help others. It is so often heard in the media, yet only you have walked the extra mile to talk to a great person at greater depth. As a college student, I have found to relieve some study load, so I could focus on my health, do more of things I really keen on… Its only life without too much stress and anxiety that can help all the other elements work. Agree? Thank you for the inspirational article!

Miro Torg
3 years ago

She’s so nice !

3 years ago

An INFJ here! Everything about me so accurate. I hope more and more find out about these.

Hison Hison
3 years ago


1 year ago

Hi! You are right. Thank you!